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Thread: Concrete 2 Pager

  1. #1

    Concrete 2 Pager

    Did this small 2 pager, "script" and art by me.
    Critiques are welcome, any suggestions are helpful!




    Last edited by Pete Tha Creep; 03-24-2017 at 07:17 PM.
    "Censorship is legal vandalization of art" - Urban Dictionary
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  2. #2
    Looks great pete! Page one is super strong, solid composition and layout, it reads really well and Concrete's pose on the first panel is really well done.

    page 2 would be better imho if that power button was a little clearer, or maybe read a little better if you had him just simply removing it?

    Really nice though.
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  3. #3
    Thanks for the crit man, really appreciated! You're right about the power button, that should be an easy fix.
    "Censorship is legal vandalization of art" - Urban Dictionary
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    petethacreepofficial

  4. #4
    Not quitting his day job yet... [SUPPORTER]
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    As a huge Concrete fan I am thrilled to find this!!! I think the concept and writing is spot-on and captures Concrete's tone perfectly.

    I agree with Seithe's comment about the power button on page 2. The other art critique I have is the inconsistent use of line weights in the pages. It is generally very consistent except in the last panel where there are a lot of fine lines that are largely missing from the other panels. I suspect this is a purposeful choice to really highlight the break from the augmented reality bolder lines - and I LOVE this choice. However, maintaining the bold lines in the background and on Concrete in this last panel makes the foreground rubble seem inconsistent instead of purposeful. My recommendation would be to make Concrete and the background elements more detailed in line with the foreground rubble. This will make the panel have the visual twist I think you are looking for.

    Thanks again for brightening my day with one of my favorite characters!!!!
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