Solid start but, you need to think the perspective all the way to the end. Perspective is more than radiating lines, it's about projecting scale over distance as well.
Your VP is Superman, the frame of the drawing is Kryptonite. Get Superman to close to Kryptonite and he dies. To protect Superman, keep him as far from the Kryptonite as possible. The closer the VP gets to the frame, the more distortion you get.
A street this size will have sidewalks as wide, if not wider, than a traffic lane: 12-15 feet
Watch your depth. Building facades are over long. What you call 1 building is closer to 4-5. Get some roof top on your roof tops: Tanks, coops, vents etc.
Opposite limbs forward. If his left arm is forward, his left leg is back. Get the knee in and use the curve of the mail to show direction
Again, watch your depths: Bricks, buildings etc. The diameter of the water tank must be smaller that the side of the platform. Draw platform in perspective, find its midlines and midpoint. Mark the diameter of the tank along the horizontal midline. Drop a vertical through the midpoint to find the VP of the tank (which is different than the VP of the drawing) Follow the circle in perspective guide to determine the foot print of the tank, project the sides upward.
Thanks as always, Paul!
Tried practicing using your guide, took me a few tries to get the hand of it! I've always had a problem with circles in perspective.
After showing it around, I think page 02 should definitely be re-done. This is what I'm going with. I'll keep your pointers about depth and the stuff on the rooftops in mind!
Note that, esp with the footprint hidden, an ellipse guide would do the trick. The freehand guide is for those times when 15º-30º-45º-60º and 1/4"increments won't do.
I'm tempted to tell you not to redo it but, it's a sample and you want that to be the best you can do. However, mulligans are a dangerous trap and you can easily find yourself tossing more pages than you keep (eek) When the feeling strikes, try laying down for a while to see if the feeling won't go away on it's own.
Before going further, is this a back alley or a street? 2 lanes, no parking suggests an alley or a country lane in the sticks. If this is a city street, what part of the city is it? A downtown ave, an uptown street? The first version suggests the combat zone where 2 traffic lanes, 2 parking lanes, no turn lane makes sense. A major Blvd could have 2 parking lanes, 2 bus lanes, 6 traffic lanes, 2 turn lanes and a median (13 lanes wide) Figure out where you are, what the traffic is first and then build up rather than drawing buildings first and squeezing the street into what's left.
FWIW, I like the more casual hands down walk in the first version where he's unconcerned with the ants below as opposed to the swearing vengeance pose in ver 2.
Very nice pages, that's some great drawing. The advice given about page two was wonderful, but I must say - on first viewing, it comes over really good. Very nice figure and lay-out, really grabs the eye.
You could make all the cars face the viewer and imply it's a one-way street (and possibly place a sign, but there's no side streets), but Smitty's advice always gives good things to consider.
Enjoyed all the pages and think it's some fantastic sketches. I only offer some points that stand out personally - Alfred's lower arm(s) seem a little short in the first panel. He may come over a tad small in panel three - at least to me, I'd stretch him just a little.
Your dynamics and poses are great, but possibly the pedestrians on page two seem slightly out of keeping with the rest. Style-wise, that is - but it is small, and perhaps more for the inking phase. But lovely pages, very cool.
Hi Mr. Smith! Actually, the width of the script is one of the things that's been annoying me about my first attempt. It's supposed to be a seedy part of Gotham, and a larger street seemed "off" somehow. So I went with a smaller street.
But the main reason is that it was pointed out to me by some very talented artists that the figure seemed gigantic. And the large size of the figure on the panel, something I'm not used to, is partially what I'd attribute to the awkward pose, which Smitty also caught. I like how in this new version, his feet aren't over the road, which I think helps address that.
(I've actually editted this further, as I realize I totally made a huge mistake. The script called for the dude to be looking downwards while throwing a fireball)
Also, shaw, will consider you're points about Alfred. I agree!
Thanks for taking the time, you two. Highly appreciated.
While I DON'T recommend scaled 3 pt perspective in every panel (there's not time enough in the day for that) this is one place where a quick scale will save a world of hurt.
Your first two decisions are arbitrary; After that everything else is locked down. I've decided on six lanes (2 sidewalks, 2 parking lanes, 2 traffic lanes suitable to a red light district... not that I *koff-koff* have ever seen one *koff-koff* AND lanes are 12 feet wide (pretty much city standard these days) YOU DO NOT HAVE TO AGREE! Whatever two decisions you make are correct because you smurfin' well said so (you smurfin' well say soer you) Perhaps you think, "this is the oldest part of an old city and 10' is wide enough with no parking lanes." If that's what you think then you're right. However, the technique remains the same, all you need do is adjust the parts.
Start with the horizontal scale. I placed it where I have because, on my wacom, that distance is 1.5 inches and easily divided into six 1/4 increments. Next the horizontal scale, again with 1/4"=12' increments. Note that 12 feet is a bit short for a first floor and a bit tall for floors two and above but, we're not doing architectural plans, verisimilitude will work. The first modern "skyscraper", built in Chicago in 1885, was only 10 stories tall. For an old, seedy district in an old, seedy town, I'd keep things in the 4-6 story range.
Here's the re-made page!
Thanks Smitty for the insight and techniques!
I tried your scale technique, and tried to keep depth in mind. I don't think I did it perfectly-- this made me realize that I REALLY need to observe real life measurements more. I'll sheepishly admit that I've never even really thought about how many feet a road would be, how tall a ceiling is...I always just try to eyeball everything. But at least with my mistakes here, they aren't arbitrary mistakes, but measured ones-- and those are fixable. More practice!!!
And, nobody's ever seen a red light district. We all just reference from google. *wink*
Man i love how you drew Batman in this. Harley looks great. i didnt look into the background but the people look great!
HOLY SPIT TAKE, BAT-DUDE!!! That's smurfin' brilliant! I had to sit down so I could stand up to give you an ovation!
No Parking? BRILLIANT! This street goes back to the days or horse and buggy. The T intersection? BRILLIANT! The character reactions? BRILLIANT!
If I could suggest two itsy-bitsy, teenie-weenie (yellow polka dot bikini) tweaks. 1- Plant his left foot flat on the... air... flamey disc things. Everything fits it a box, including his footprint. Draw the box with a VP just slightly to the left (our left) of the scene's VP which will give us just a hint of heel. 2- Add schmutz; You could eat off that street. We want flotsam, jetsam, stuff which accumulates in the gutters and against the buildings. Little blotches of black and white.
In future, for far BG buildings, avoid drawing every window in favor of suggestion. Try a black grid with a white grid, offset, on top; Black verticals crossed with white horizontals; Black verticals alone (or horizontals)